Read our posts about wellbeing

How To Become A Better Listener

How To Become A Better Listener

Our environments have become increasingly and worryingly noisier. We talk and text constantly on mobile phones.  It’s the norm to see couples and friends out eating and drinking, and everyone will have their heads down texting or tweeting, even whilst in conversation. So it’s not surprising that as our digital talk increases we’ve steadily become poorer listeners, not better ones. So how does one become a better listener and can you learn to listen well? We’ve become adept at a type of hearing which processes information through our own personal filters. Most...
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How Mid-life Changed My Relationship with Exercise

How Mid-life Changed My Relationship with Exercise

I was the classic bookish school girl who hated PE. One of my earliest memories is of watching my primary school sports day from the tiny window of the locked loo cubicle where I’d hidden myself. I loathed the cold. I was mortified by  ‘cross country’ running round the local housing estate in red knickers. I was baffled by the fact that despite my scrawny build and long legs, I couldn’t run fast. And, oh yes, that I was so uncoordinated that when it was time for the scary, sporty girls to pick teams, I was actually offered to the opposing side. In fact, those...
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How to Surrender to Uncertainty

How to Surrender to Uncertainty

Surrender is a positive, healthy state. Being a surrendered person does not mean one is beaten down and so hopeless he or she has "given up." It's quite the contrary. Surrender is a state of living in the flow, trusting what is, and being open to serendipity and surprises. As I write in The Ecstasy of Surrender, adopting the behaviors and habits of surrendered people helps us improve our relationships, feel love and gratitude, get healthier, give up destructive people and behavior patterns, and become more successful and influential in our lives and careers. And...
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Self Protection: A Therapist's Guide

Self Protection: A Therapist's Guide

I often get asked about how I can listen to my client's distress all week without crumpling with exhaustion or getting distressed myself. I tend to give a short answer so as not to put people off asking me anything ever again, something like, “My training involves learning to protect myself/ I make sure to have plenty of supervision”. But there's a much better, longer answer that involves re-calibrating how I empathise in order to ensure my own self protection. Supervision is part of the self-care necessary for any therapist, but it is also an ethical requirement....
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Celebrating Springtime

Celebrating Springtime

Spring is the season of hope where we see the early signs of the labour of the winter months come to life. What a good time to notice the parallels in our own lives. Whether our New Year hopes and plans have failed or stalled, spring reminds us that there's still time to start over again. Spring is here I woke up this morning to find the patio outside my kitchen door scattered with big, thick, clumps of fiery green moss, fallen debris from the guttering where the magpies are making their nests, the first hints that spring is on it’s way. Researchers are...
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Feeling Present & Grounded in the Now

Feeling Present & Grounded in the Now

Time to stand and stare seems in increasingly short supply in the dizzy digital age. Many of us feel more time-poor and more pressured than ever. The ability to pull yourself together at a moment’s notice, to gather your focus and your presence so you can emanate calm and confidence is a core skill-set for the modern age. Here are some tips to help you find your centre of gravitas. Find your roots – and your wings: The Sanskrit word guru means “one who cannot be pushed over”. If you want to emanate grounded presence, think gravity – and its oppositional forces, the...
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Arianna Huffington: "It's not all about money and power"

Arianna Huffington: "It's not all about money and power"

Arianna Huffington is founder and former owner of The Huffington Post. Her new book Thrive: The Third Metric to Redefining Success and Creating a Happier Life  is out now. What’s wrong with the current definition of success? Our definition of success right now is based almost solely on money and power. And so to succeed, we lead lives of overwork, sleep-deprivation and burnout. These are actually considered badges of honor! We voluntarily drive ourselves into the ground, if not the grave. This idea of success can work—or at least appear to work—in the short term....
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Writing a Diary Saved My Life

Writing a Diary Saved My Life

Imagine getting to the end of your life and there's no record of who you are, where you've been, no trace of the range of emotions, feelings you’ve experienced at various points or stages of your life. What if your memory slowly melted into candy floss, too soft to recall the intricate, sometimes simple and other times significant details of your past life? Leaving you without hard evidence and data of what you’ve lived through, the obstacles you'd overcome and the success you'd achieved over the years? A point brought home in an advert I clipped out of a magazine for...
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Knitting Therapy

Knitting Therapy

The feel of soft yarn between your fingers, the rhythmic click-click-click of knitting needles, the satisfaction of watching your work growing inch by inch while at the the same time your breathing slows, your body relaxes and the cares of the day slip away with every stitch. No wonder knitting is so popular. People knit for four main reasons - relaxation, stress relief, therapeutic qualities and in order to be productive. The rise of this old-fashioned hobby over the last few years has very little to do with thrift - after all, you can buy a scarf on the high street...
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Cycling Can Change Your Life

Cycling Can Change Your Life

How many times have we heard that doing exercise is good for us?  But easier said than done, right?  I currently work full time as a beauty editor and am also in my fifth year of training as a psychotherapist so it can be hard enough to factor in time to see my friends and boyfriend, let alone some me-time.  As for exercise – are you crazy? Then last November, over a glass of wine, a friend suggested this hare-brained idea of cycling the length of the country - from Lands End to John O’Groats - to raise money for a small school for underprivileged kids in Peru where I...
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