Read our posts about

"Breaking up is Hard To Do"

"Breaking up is Hard To Do"

The moment when we end a relationship - or have an ending thrust upon us - is almost always exquisitely painful. But of course it's not just the moment of break up that hurts. The aftermath, as we recover, is arguably just as painful not least because it lasts longer - sometimes for years. After the early 'phoney war' of feeling convinced that reconciliation is just around the corner, or of feeling relieved that the vicious arguments are now over, it is then that the long-term suffering begins. Yes, some of us 'keep calm and carry on', and parting...
» Read More
Why We Shouldn't Try to be Perfect Mothers

Why We Shouldn't Try to be Perfect Mothers

‘Dear Sebastian,’ the letter began in a childish script. ‘Thank you very much for my Birthday Present. I love ‘Angelina Ballerina’ books. Love Yore God Daughter Eleanor’. I laughed. As any mother reading this will know, the likelihood that my husband Sebastian would have a) known it was his god-daughter’s birthday b) sent her a present and c) known that she liked Angelina Ballerina would have been as likely as me going six rounds at the pub. For the truth is, while women have made huge strides in the workplace, many men have not made commensurate progress at...
» Read More
Losing My Identity: Sally Brampton

Losing My Identity: Sally Brampton

Quite recently, I lost my identity, which sounds rather careless given that I hadn't, until some days had passed, realised it was missing. It started with a phone call, one sunny morning. Something I had loved, and had spent years involved with in happy occupation, was taken away. It took all of three minutes. I put down the phone and looked around the room. Nothing had changed. Everything was still in its place. But everything had changed. Once I had dusted myself down, I shrugged and thought, "Well, that's that. Time to move on." I didn't take it...
» Read More
The Beautiful Game and Depression

The Beautiful Game and Depression

Footballer Gary Speed, former captain-turned-manager of the Welsh national team, had movie star looks, a million pound mansion, a beautiful young wife and two sports-obsessed sons. He seemed to have the world at his feet. But three years ago he took his own life after an embittered battle with depression. With the World Cup in Brazil only days away it is easy to cloak our footballers with the super human strength of gladiators in Ancient Rome. However when the arena clears and the applause dies away, cases like Speed’s are sadly far from rare. A study carried out by...
» Read More
Learning to Grieve

Learning to Grieve

No-one wants to grieve. I remember a moment at the hospital with my husband, who had collapsed that morning with what turned out to be a brain haemorrhage. Things were going from bad to worse, and then worse again; it was becoming clear that he might not survive. My mind rebelled, in advance, against what I knew I might have to go through – the shock, the sadness, the painful work of rebuilding my life. It felt completely daunting and I simply did not want it to start. Grieving is about coming to terms with loss and change, and we humans are creatures of habit. We...
» Read More
Deep Tissue and Trigger Point Massage

Deep Tissue and Trigger Point Massage

If you suffer from muscle tension and pain, caused by posture, sports or injury, deep tissue and trigger point massage is the place to go. The massage is stronger than average and can help with: Chronic muscle tension Recovering from injury Carpal Tunnel Muscle spasm Chronic headaches Muscle strain Though used separately, the two complementary massage styles are often used together to get a deep release. What happens in a session? Your therapist asks you to fill in the usual client questionnaire, covering questions about the...
» Read More
How Mid-life Changed My Relationship with Exercise

How Mid-life Changed My Relationship with Exercise

I was the classic bookish school girl who hated PE. One of my earliest memories is of watching my primary school sports day from the tiny window of the locked loo cubicle where I’d hidden myself. I loathed the cold. I was mortified by  ‘cross country’ running round the local housing estate in red knickers. I was baffled by the fact that despite my scrawny build and long legs, I couldn’t run fast. And, oh yes, that I was so uncoordinated that when it was time for the scary, sporty girls to pick teams, I was actually offered to the opposing side. In fact, those...
» Read More
Boarding School Survivors

Boarding School Survivors

“Are we going to be head of rugby?” a well-dressed mother self-consciously jokes with another. They stand by their BMWs in the forecourt of a prep school accepting their tiny sons for the first time. Trunks have been carried in, housemasters have made brisk reassuring comments, and the ‘settling in period’ has begun. There are no tears. The scene comes from a BBC 40 Minutes documentary, made 20 years ago, called The Making of Them, in which young boarders were discreetly filmed over their first few weeks at prep school. It is available on YouTube, but careful: it...
» Read More