A lovely morning cup of cappuccino is standing on my desk right now. My partner brought it to me with a smile. He loves doing it. He loves... doing things for me: making me coffee, preparing meals, planning trips, making sure the right hotel is booked, making sure we have things to do when we are away.

Why am I telling you all this?

Because this is an example of who I would consider a highly masculine energy man. I understand this energy as a man who loves to give. They love to give freely. It makes them happy to do things for their partner. Why?

Because when they do, and we show them how these things make us happy, when we smile when we see our morning coffee, when we appreciate what they do for us, they feel deeply rewarded.

When I say, "Thank you! When you bring me my morning coffee, it makes me feel so loved and cared for" - I mean it.

This way of appreciating someone can make all the difference in the world in intimate relationships. The secret here is that we refer to how the action of another makes us feel:

"It feels so good when you ask about my day, this makes me feel you really care."

"When you fix me dinner in the evening, it makes me feel so happy as I feel so cared for by you."

When you connect with your feelings whilst expressing genuine gratitude, you suddenly transform a standard "thank you", into a message that reaches the heart and forms an emotional connection.

Many of my female clients struggle to receive during the dating process or in a relationship. Equally, going back to the coffee from the example above, I could make my own coffee. Or, I could make coffee for both of us. I could turn it into a habit, take over all the cooking, take over all the planning.

But the thing is, this wouldn't make my partner happy. When a partner loves to give in a relationship, not being able to can lead to feelings of uselessness and disconnection.

This doesn't mean that I don't lift a finger and do not do anything in this relationship. Absolutely not. It simply means, that it is important to be open to receiving. Some common examples of where my female clients struggle with the concept of receiving:

• receiving a gift
• receiving a compliment
• allowing their date to pay for their coffee
• letting someone carry a heavy bag for you
• allowing your husband to cook a meal