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The Cycle of Stress: Don't Take it Out on Your Loved Ones

The Cycle of Stress: Don't Take it Out on Your Loved Ones

Jul 22, 2025

    • It can be all too easy to funnel stress and frustration towards those closest to us, when they don't deserve it
    • Coach Lorena Bernal offers her tips for self-regulation and communication

In the whirlwind of life's demands, it's not uncommon to find ourselves overwhelmed, stressed, and in the heat of the moment, unintentionally projecting these feelings onto those closest to us. Our family, parents, and close friends often become unintended recipients of our internal turmoil. However, understanding and navigating our emotional landscape can transform our relationships and bring us closer to a state of peace and understanding, both within ourselves and with those around us. So, here's some insights on how to stop the cycle of stress from affecting these connections.

Look at the mirrors around us

Have you ever noticed that sometimes the qualities or actions in others that trigger us the most are, in fact, reflections of our own inner world? Our closest relationships act as mirrors, revealing aspects of ourselves we might not be willing to confront. Recognising this can be both startling and enlightening. By acknowledging that our reactions often say more about us than about the other person, we embark on a journey of self-discovery and healing.

It's essential to remember that everyone around us is navigating their own life, complete with struggles and stories unknown to us. While we share parts of our lives with our loved ones, we can never fully grasp their experiences or the paths they've walked. Understanding this helps us foster empathy and patience, reminding us that our perceptions of others are often limited and filtered through our own experiences.

Remember: The blame game doesn't build bridges

Blaming others for our feelings or projecting our stresses onto them only muddies the waters of our relationships. Instead of fostering understanding and support, it creates distance and misunderstanding. It's a hard habit to break, but recognising this pattern is the first step toward building healthier, more supportive connections.

Much of our stress and insecurity stem from comparisons - either with an unattainable ideal or with the lives of others. By learning to be present, to embrace the here and now without judgment, we open ourselves to genuine connections. This presence brings a sense of peace and acceptance, not only for ourselves but for our loved ones as well.

Embrace being alone, yet supported

Realising that we are fundamentally alone in our experiences doesn't have to be isolating. Instead, it can be liberating. It reminds us that while our journeys are our own, we are surrounded by individuals who, often unknowingly, support and reflect aspects of ourselves that need attention and care. This understanding can help us navigate our relationships more gracefully, accepting and giving support without imposing our own narratives onto others.

Accept the gift of presence and love

Cultivating a practice of mindfulness and connecting with our heart is perhaps the greatest gift we can give to ourselves and those around us. It allows us to find peace within the chaos, to approach our relationships with love and understanding. The more at peace we are with ourselves, the more peace and love we radiate to those around us, creating a positive cycle that enriches our connections.

Navigating the complexities of our emotions and relationships isn't always straightforward, but it's a journey worth embarking on. By understanding the reflections our loved ones offer us, embracing everyone's unique stories, and stepping away from the blame game, we open the door to healthier, more supportive relationships. Remember, the path to peace starts within. By fostering mindfulness and connecting deeply with our own hearts, we create a space where love and understanding can flourish, not just for ourselves, but for everyone we hold dear.

Love is the answer

In the mosaic of emotions that paint our daily lives, there is one vibrant hue with the power to overshadow the darker tones of stress, anger, overwhelm or worry. That colour is love. Love, in its purest form, acts as a beacon of light, instantly ushering peace and harmony into our lives, casting a warm glow over every shadow. It's a transformative force, one that not only alters our relationship with ourselves but also reshapes our interactions with the world and those who inhabit it.

Imagine nurturing a love so profound for your body, your journey, the very essence of your life –appreciating the rhythm of your breath, the steady beat of your heart. Consider the warmth of love for the simple things: the gift of friendship, the bond of family, the comfort of hot water, the air that fills your lungs, the trees that stand watch, and the sun that lights our way. Deciding to love and express gratitude for everything in your life isn't just an act of kindness; it's a conscious choice that guides you toward a state of mindfulness. To truly embrace and appreciate the value of these gifts, we must pause, breathe, observe, and cherish.

This approach to life, this decision to see through a lens of love and gratitude, naturally cultivates peace and compassion within your heart. It positions you to navigate your life from a place of profound authenticity and wisdom. By choosing love, you grant yourself the ability to engage with the world from a foundation of understanding and kindness, rather than from a place of judgment or resentment.

Life, with all its complexities and trials, is a gift meant to be cherished and enjoyed. Getting caught up in worries, comparisons, holding onto grudges, and passing judgment diminishes the richness of our experiences. At the end of the day, these negative energies simply aren't worth our time or emotional investment. Love offers us a way out, a path to peace and fulfilment. It invites us to stop, to truly see the beauty in our lives, and to acknowledge the profound power of our emotional landscape.

Embracing love as the cornerstone of your emotional wellbeing doesn't negate the challenges we face; rather, it provides us with a resilient and open heart to meet those challenges. Love doesn't erase the difficulties, but it does give us the strength and perspective to navigate them with grace. As we cultivate love within ourselves and extend it outward, we find that the world, in turn, reflects this love back to us in countless, unexpected ways.


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Lorena Bernal

Lorena Bernal is a certified life coach and spiritual life coach, and founder of the events and coaching platform Live Love Better.

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