Rehnuma Choudhury

I’m an Integrative Psychotherapist and Counselling Psychologist doctoral candidate working with people navigating shifting identities, feeling fundamentally different from others, and the sense that the old narratives are no longer working. It can be unsettling to feel that the version of yourself you’ve been living inside no longer fits. In this sense, therapy might be the first real invitation and opportunity to find out who you actually are. With experience spanning the NHS and private clinics, I’m a warm, down-to-earth presence here to think with you about what’s keeping things stuck for you and ways to move forward. What brings people here You might come knowing what you want to explore or just knowing that something has stopped working, without being able to name what. You might find that self-awareness has only gotten you so far, and still find yourself feeling lost in it all. What connects people who work with me tends to be a sense that the story you’ve told yourself or roles you’ve taken on throughout life have started to feel more like a constraint than a choice. Maybe it’s a life narrative that is slowly crumbling, now showing up as feelings of emptiness, aloneness or numbness. Other times it’s sadness or anger that feels forbidden. Often you’re left with a deep wariness of other people that now makes closeness feel impossible. Either way, you feel like things can’t continue in this way. An inclusive, culturally informed space Culture, religion and wider systemic experiences shape how you experience yourself and the world. In our space these are never left at the door, but whether they become an explicit focus is entirely your choice. In your space with me, nothing is assumed or imposed uncritically. I welcome and have extensive experience working with cultural and religious minorities and LGBTQ+ experiences. I’m currently researching personal experiences of being shunned from religious communities, and welcome clients who are navigating this and other religious and cultural trauma in my therapy room. My approach Having worked in the NHS and in private clinics, I find that psychodynamic and existential frameworks, alongside Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) tend to get to the heart of most problems and allow meaningful shifts to take place. This means we think about relational patterns and questions around meaning and identity that shape how you experience yourself and others, where they came from, and what maintaining them is costing you. We’ll also think about creating a different relationship with difficult thoughts and emotions (such as around anxiety and panic) that might be making daily life difficult to navigate. At the heart of all of it is the relationship between us, as I believe change happens through the experience of being genuinely known by another person, and through paying attention to what unfolds between us directly. How sessions feel Sessions can be long or short term depending on what you need. This won’t be a space defined by distant expertise of a therapist who sits back and observes or analyses you. With me you can expect warm but honest engagement where we are in it together. This means that two-way observations, connections, and challenges are part of how we function in our space together and I invite you to be as open as you can about your experience of our sessions. Areas of particular interest and experience Chronic feelings of emptiness and feeling different from others My doctoral research at the University of Roehampton explores what it’s like to live with chronic feelings of emptiness and how this often comes with numbness, feeling disconnected from yourself and feeling fundamentally different from others. Emptiness tends to be hard to put into words, and is often labelled as depression and poorly served by short-term therapy approaches that you might find in the NHS. If you’re feeling empty or a void or deadness inside but nothing really seems to help, talking about it with someone who has worked with this experience can help create a meaningful shift. Shifts in identity and sense of self I’ve found that a lot of meaningful work happens at the point where the version of a self someone has built, usually for very good reasons, starts to feel inadequate or inauthentic. For you this might feel like the family, cultural narratives or narratives about yourself that got you here are now crumbling without anything to replace them. Sometimes this leads to a creeping sense of unreality and dissatisfaction, or feeling trapped in an old life with anger, despair, grief, and sadness coming up that you’re unsure you’re allowed to feel. I find that thinking about your values, relational history and how this affects the way you relate to larger questions of meaning and identity can help create meaningful shifts here. How trauma affects relationships Traumatic experiences can leave deep marks. Through working in an NHS Complex Trauma service, I see regularly how over time, what may have allowed you to survive a long time ago can now make real closeness with others feel unsafe, produce the same pain in relationships repeatedly, or mean you’ve created a version of yourself that feels functional but hollow. If this resonates, we’ll work in a trauma-informed way to create the safety you need to start moving towards a fulfilling life. Contact me I offer a free 20-minute consultation via phone call or Google Meet to all who make a new enquiry. This is an informal conversation rather than a formal assessment. There is no obligation to proceed afterwards. [email protected] www.rehnumapsychology.co.uk