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Navigating My Daughter’s Cancer Journey
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When Dagmara Beine's daughter was diagnosed with cancer, her world shattered
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Here she shares what she learned about supporting a child through cancer treatment and beyond
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We have therapists who specialise in working with cancer sufferers and their families – find them here
When my daughter was first diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia (AML), the world as I knew it shattered. As a mother and a medical professional, I was thrust into a new reality where I quickly found myself questioning what I had previously accepted as ‘just the way it is’. My journey through her diagnosis and subsequent battles against cancer has profoundly shaped my approach to both parenting and medicine.
Stop, breathe and learn
Hearing the words, "your child has cancer," is an indescribable moment. The shock, fear, and uncertainty are overwhelming. As parents, we instinctively want to protect our children, to fix things. But cancer is a formidable foe that simply does not have a quick fix.
Already in those early days, I found solace in information. I devoured medical texts, research articles, and sought opinions from specialists worldwide. There had to be a ‘why’, there had to be A Better Way.
I recommend all parents who have just received their diagnosis stop, breath and learn:
Stop: Take a moment to process the diagnosis. It’s OK to feel overwhelmed. Give yourself the space to acknowledge your emotions. Despite what it may feel like, cancer is almost never an emergency. You can take a few days to stop and process the information and make educated decisions.
Breathe: Deep breaths can help calm your mind. Practice mindfulness or meditation to centre yourself and manage stress.
Learn: Empower yourself with knowledge. Understand the diagnosis, treatment options, and potential side effects. Seek second, third and fourth opinions and wait for all testing to come back before starting treatment.
Embracing an integrative approach to cancer care
Traditional treatments like chemotherapy and radiation are often necessary, but they take a significant toll. I quickly discovered that there was more I could do to support my daughter. My background as a Physician’s Assistant gave me the foundational knowledge that served me well as I went on to pursue a PhD in integrative medicine, and my training in both the conventional medical world and the holistic world, mixed with my real world battle as a mum to a daughter with cancer has given me a unique perspective on how to support the paediatric population through these treatments.
We incorporated nutrition, mindfulness practices, and targeted supplements and natural therapies like mistletoe as well as repurposed pharmaceuticals like Low Dose Naltrexone (LDN) into my daughters plan, and have seen how these additions have played crucial roles in boosting her immune system and improving her quality of life.
Now that I work with paediatric patients and their families all over the US, I frequently see the obstacle that one parent is more interested in pursuing an integrative approach than the other. My advice for families in this situation is to bring understanding to the fact that integrative care is supportive of conventional care. My book is a great place to start for parents who are on the fence.
Zuza’s Way Integrative Care
Not long after my daughter concluded her initial treatment for AML, I opened the doors to my very own clinic: Zuza’s Way Integrative Care. Here, I treat patients with a terrain-based approach, focusing on the whole person. We look at lifestyle modifications, targeted supplements, and other integrative therapies to support the body’s natural healing processes.
Over the past years my clinic has grown to be the go-to place for integrative cancer care for children and I have been honoured to walk alongside countless families on this journey.
Practical advice for parents from a cancer mum and practitioner
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Educate yourself: Knowledge is empowering. Understand your child’s diagnosis and the proposed treatments. Don’t be afraid to ask questions or seek second opinions. Understand what contributed to your child’s diagnosis in the first place – let go of blame, and accept that paediatric cancer is not just bad luck. If you know what made your child sick, you can work to keep your child healthy.
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Create a care plan: Integrate the best of conventional oncology and holistic cancer care into a comprehensive plan.
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Focus on nutrition: A therapeutic and nutrient dense diet can significantly impact your child’s strength and recovery. Consult with a nutritionist to tailor a diet that supports healing (tip: you likely won’t find this person working at the hospital).
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Emotional wellbeing: Encourage activities that bring joy and relaxation to your child. Mindfulness practices, art therapy, and gentle exercise can be incredibly beneficial.
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Build a support network: Surround yourself with a supportive community. Join support groups, both in-person and online, where you can share experiences and advice. I offer a support group for those who are enrolled in my course.
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Self-care for parents: Caring for a child with cancer is exhausting. Ensure you are also taking time for self-care. Your wellbeing is important for providing the best care for your child.
Looking ahead
My daughter is currently cancer free and healing. Writing my book A Parent’s Guide to Childhood Cancer was a deeply personal endeavor and has been healing to me in many ways. It’s a compilation of the knowledge and experiences I’ve gathered over years of treating my daughter and other young patients. My hope is that this book becomes a beacon of hope and a practical guide for parents walking the road of pediatric cancer.
The path ahead may be challenging, but remember, you are not alone. Embrace the support around you, trust in your intuition, and never lose hope.
Dagmara Beine is the author of A Parent's Guide to Childhood Cancer