• Modern society can feel relentless, and many of us see being busy as a sign that we're thriving

  • Coach Lorena Bernal explores why this mindset can be dangerous, and how to embrace rest


In a world that constantly demands speed and productivity, being busy is often seen as a symbol of success. We wear it like a badge of honour, believing that if we’re constantly occupied, we’re thriving. But in reality, this mindset can leave us feeling overwhelmed, stressed, and disconnected from what truly matters. 

The obsession with busyness stems from a deeper societal narrative that productivity is the key to thriving, but what if we’re missing something? What if true success and fulfilment come from something deeper than constant activity?


The survival-driven mindset of busyness

Our brains are wired to ensure our survival. This means that if we think we need to stay active and constantly productive to succeed—or even just survive—our minds will push us into a relentless cycle of doing. This is where the obsession with being busy begins. We start to equate rest with laziness, and the mere thought of taking a break can bring on feelings of guilt. We might feel like we’re falling behind, so we force ourselves to keep going, even when our bodies and minds are crying out for a pause.

Society reinforces this narrative in every corner of our lives—whether it’s in our careers, our parenting, or even our social lives. We’re conditioned to believe that only those who are constantly active and productive are truly thriving. The pressure to be in motion affects how we view success, health, relationships, and even self-worth. And as a result, we end up living in a state of constant alertness—our nervous systems in perpetual fight-or-flight mode, leading to chronic stress and burnout.


The power of pausing: Shifting the mindset

To break free from this cycle, we need to shift our mindset. And the first step in doing that is learning to pause. When we take a moment to step back and disconnect from the noise of our thinking brain, we can begin to tune into what truly matters. Instead of being driven by the need to “do,” we can ask ourselves important questions: 

  • What brings us joy? 
  • What aligns with our purpose? 
  • Are we acting from a place of passion and intention, or are we simply trying to fill a void by staying busy?


This type of reflection helps us regain control of our lives. It allows us to question whether our actions are aligned with what we truly value, or if they’re driven by an ingrained belief that constant productivity equals worth. We don’t need to be in perpetual motion to feel fulfilled. In fact, it’s often in the moments of stillness and reflection that we reconnect with our deeper sense of purpose.


Nature as our teacher: Trusting the natural rhythm

We are part of nature, made from the same elements as the earth, plants, and animals. Yet we often believe that we are different—that we must outpace the natural world to succeed. But nature itself is our greatest teacher. Everything in nature, from the tides to the growth of plants, follows a natural rhythm. There’s movement, yes, but also periods of rest and regeneration. The Earth spins, the seasons change, and life unfolds in cycles of activity and stillness.

If we allow ourselves to follow these natural rhythms, we can experience a much deeper sense of balance. Trusting the wisdom of our bodies and listening to the cues from within allows us to surrender control and move in harmony with life. It’s not about abandoning progress or ambition, but about aligning our actions with our true intentions and moving forward with inner peace rather than constant anxiety.


Finding health, success, and connection at your own pace

Do you want to be healthy? Then trust your body—listen to what it’s telling you and respect the signals it sends about when to rest and when to act. Do you want to be a good parent? Connect to your love, wisdom, and intuition. Let these qualities guide you instead of the external pressures to be the “perfect” parent who is constantly doing. Do you want to achieve success in your career? Follow your passion and move forward step-by-step. Success doesn’t come from forcing yourself into overdrive, but from pacing yourself with intention and patience.

Every goal we have—whether it’s related to health, relationships, or wealth—can be pursued more effectively when we approach it from a place of balance. When we are connected to our inner nature, we can act with purpose and joy, rather than from a frantic need to prove ourselves.


Embracing your unique rhythm

As humans, we each have our own natural rhythm, and respecting that rhythm is key to finding balance in life. Rest is just as important as action. Taking time to breathe, relax, and connect with loved ones is not a sign of weakness—it’s essential for our well-being. We are enough as we are, already whole and perfect in our uniqueness. It’s not constant productivity that defines us, but the harmony between our work and our rest, our doing and our being.

Recognise who you are at your core. A tiger doesn’t compare itself to an ant; a lion doesn’t try to swim like a fish. Each creature moves according to its own instincts and nature. Similarly, we must listen to our own intuition and instincts rather than comparing ourselves to others. What works for someone else may not be right for you, and that’s perfectly fine. The world needs authentic, unique individuals who bring their own talents and rhythms to the table.


Mindfulness in daily life: Enjoying the present moment

Mindfulness is about living in the now, fully immersed in the present moment without being consumed by worries about the future or guilt from the past. It’s about moving through life like you would when you dance—not with a fixed destination in mind, but with joy and connection to each step and beat. When you dance, you’re not thinking about where you’re going; you’re simply enjoying the movement, the flow, the rhythm. This is how we should approach everything we do—present, engaged, and fully alive in the moment.

In our daily lives, we often focus so much on what we are supposed to achieve that we miss out on the beauty of the process itself. We become so fixated on future goals, or so stuck on past regrets, that the present slips away unnoticed. But life is happening right now, in each small task, each interaction, each breath.

By being mindful—present in every action and not rushing ahead to the next thing—we not only find more joy, but we also connect more deeply to our true purpose. Whether you’re working, caring for your family, or simply walking outside, allow yourself to be fully present. Feel the sensations of your body moving, notice the details of your surroundings, and let go of the constant need to "do" in order to prove something.

This mindful approach helps you appreciate the journey rather than anxiously focusing on the destination. Life is like a rollercoaster, and we only get one ride. Don’t miss it by being consumed with what’s next. Be here now and make the most of every moment, knowing that this is where true fulfilment lies.

Lorena Bernal is a certified life coach and spiritual life coach, and founder of the events and coaching platform Live Love Better 


Further reading

Millennials and Gen Z: Understanding your relationship to stress

Jessica Maguire's nervous system reset

How to prepare for stress peaks

8 telltale signs your nervous system is in survival mode