8 Years After My Crash: The Truth About Starting Over

When I woke up, a sudden, overwhelming fear gripped me. Something was obviously wrong but I had no idea what. I saw my dad sitting next to my bed and tried to ask him what had happened – only to discover that I could no longer speak. 

I was bedridden for the next few years and during that time I made good progress in terms of understanding what had happened. Looking back, I think the catastrophic brain injury I sustained kept me in the dark about the severity of the situation, and in many ways that was a blessing in disguise. My limited ability to understand the enormity of the event shielded me from the realisation that my youth had been stolen from me at just 22 years old, and that my entire future was now very different.

Gradually my cognitive abilities returned. The slow pace of recovery helped soften the blow and allowed me to time to adjust to my new reality.

Towards the end of my second residential rehab, it became clear that I wasn’t going to recover any further. That’s when I received my first wheelchair. I was angry – angry at life, myself and my future. I became deeply pessimistic. After the emotional devastation of learning this news, I spent the following months pushing myself to come to terms with my new life.

Not long after, I moved into a nursing home. There, I focused most of my time and energy on exploring my surroundings. My curiosity never ceased, and my world kept expanding. I learned that with a little forward planning and problem-solving, I could still do most things any other person my age might do. Little by little, my ability to plan and think ahead came back to me. 

After leaving the nursing home, I moved to a neurorehabilitation centre. There, I discovered that I wasn't allowed to leave the building unaccompanied due to my brain injury. This restriction hit me hard, making me feel like all the progress I had made was suddenly undone. I was devastated. But after some serious reflection, I identified the obstacles and took an official competency test which I passed. This achievement boosted my self-confidence and even though I was still unsure of myself at times, I had developed a strong ability to problem-solve and push forward.

Whilst at this rehabilitation centre, I hit several other personal milestones and I also managed to establish myself in road safety education and awareness. This was a major breakthrough for me. Having purpose again – being recognised and appreciated for my work – felt amazing. It was a productive way to spend my time, and I felt valued for my contributions.

I also travelled around the country, attended festivals, concerts, and social events, and I realised that I was, in fact, living a life that resembled that of a typical young man. This realisation boosted my self-belief.

After 18 months of intense neurorehabilitation, I graduated from the programme. My sense of accomplishment was through the roof! I couldn’t believe it! Just five years earlier, it was feared that I might not even survive the coma. And, if I did, that I would have little to no brain function at all. But here I was, after years of rehabilitation, immense physical and mental pain, depression and nearly 30 operations, preparing to move into a place of my own!

Reflecting on how far I have come, I’ve identified three key factors that made it possible. I'm convinced that I couldn't have achieved this progress in even half the time without these things: 

1. Perseverance

Although I didn't start with much determination, I was inspired by the people around me. Throughout my life, I've learned that surrounding yourself with others who share your dreams, ambitions, and goals makes a world of difference.

2. Belief

I had to believe in the process and trust the professionals guiding me. Mentally picturing the end result was incredibly helpful. It would have been easy to let negativity consume me, but by avoiding that mindset, I was able to work towards a better life for myself. 

3. Commitment

It's essential to always give everything you've got. While reaching a "perfect" outcome wasn't physically possible for me, none of my progress would have been achievable without dedication.

My journey has been utterly exhausting both physically and mentally but I am peace with the person I have become – positive, understanding, patient and generally much more amicable. My growth has allowed me to reach new goals, earn credibility among peers, make new friends, and set new ambitions.

It’s easy to get caught up in the challenges and setbacks that life throws our way, but focusing on the positives is key to maintaining perspective. Embracing gratitude for the small victories, no matter how insignificant they may seem, helps shift our mindset toward growth. By refusing to be consumed by negativity, we create space for hope, resilience, and the possibility of a brighter future.