Relational Therapy

Relational therapy is based on the principle that having authentic, meaningful and mutual relationships with others is a crucial cornerstone of emotional and mental health. The client and the therapist use their own relationship to create a supportive and empowering space where the client can explore any problems they have.

Relational therapists are dedicated to the therapeutic relationship and see themselves as an active participant in the client's journey. A relational therapist will make use of the relationship they build with a client to better understand their client's way of dealing with life in general.

You may hear of different types of therapists, for example psychoanalytic or psychodynamic therapists, who take a 'relational' approach. Often this is seen as a kind of modernisation of traditional therapy types, where the therapist played more of a 'blank screen' and didn't share anything of their own experience.

Relational therapy acknowledges that a strong relationship between the therapist and client is key to any progress in therapy.

Relational therapy also acknowledges that individuals are actively shaped by their experience in the wider world, and that factors like class, race, socioeconomic status and gender play important roles in people's experiences and mental health.

What can relational therapy help with?

  • Healthy boundaries
  • Assertiveness
  • Relationship problems
  • Attachment insecurity
  • Personality disorders
  • Living authentically
  • Addiction
  • Anxiety
  • Low mood and depression
  • Self-esteem

Some principles of relational therapy

Relationships are key

While Freud posited that basic instinctual drives were our fundamental motivation, relational therapy suggests instead that our need for relationship and connection is key.

Transference and countertransference

In this way, relational therapy doesn't differentiate from traditional psychoanalytic and psychodynamic thought. The feelings that the client transfers onto the therapist, and the therapist's response to this, are key components of the work.

Enactment

The client may enact the behaviours in therapy that were the reason for them seeking therapy in the first place. It can also happen that the therapist gets caught in a re-enactment where they notice that they may feel a response to the client that is familiar from what the client has described of their past.

This kind of work can be challenging in therapy but also very fruitful and offers opportunities for a relational depth that can be healing.

Intersubjectivity

Rather than being a 'blank screen', a relational therapist will, with judgement, make observations of their experience of the client, in order to raise the client's awareness.

Self-disclosure

Similarly, whilst keeping ethics and the client's best interests at heart, a relational therapist may self-disclose information about their own life or experience in the room in order to deepen a client's awareness or to further the therapeutic relationship.

If you ever feel uncomfortable or unclear about anything your therapist shares, we encourage you to be honest if you can and to talk this through with them.

Training as a relational therapist

'Relational' is an approach and attitude as much as a therapy type. A therapist may be trained in various modalities and adopt a relational approach. When you reach out to the therapists you are interested in working with, ask them a bit about how they work.

Training as a counsellor typically takes three years, training as a psychotherapist four to five.

All therapists on Welldoing are verified annually as members of reputable professional associations to ensure a high standard of training.

Last updated August 22 2024

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