Family life influences and informs us, from the beginning of our lives, to the end. All families go through changes, experience difficulties or ruptures. It is quite normal to experience issues within a family, and also to struggle in managing these.

Family dynamics impact our development and how we see ourselves in later life, influence the relationships we form, how we interact with the world and how we behave and interact with others.

Given the dynamic quality of any family, each one will operate differently, contain its own culture, rules, beliefs and values. The familial culture, rules or experiences we witness stay with us, and can lead us to view how other families operate as strange or difficult to understand.

Indeed, the word family is a single word with many complex and multiple meanings. It holds within it a wide range of feelings, thoughts and ideas. Even where there may been little contact with a family or if contact and connection ceased after a rupture or argument recently or historically, we will have all been influenced by the dynamics we experienced in our early lives.

A variety of factors can impact the relationships we have with members of our families. Indeed, these life stresses and experiences can leave lasting impressions on us. At times, familial stresses can feel immense, and overwhelm a family, making it feel as if there is no way forward.

Roles and responsibilities

It is not uncommon for issues, difficulties or pain to be absorbed by the family, or lodged in one individual particularly. Often, different family members are assigned roles whether they choose these or not . For example, the eldest may be known as the strong one, the youngest as the emotional one, a parent as stoic or grandparent as resilient. Whatever role we choose or are assigned, it will have an impact on us, and can often feel difficult to resign or respond to.

What are family issues?

A family is often considered for many as a source of support, care and love; however this is not always the case for us all, and often family life is far from perfect. It may not be that difficulties are constant, but it is common that problems emerge periodically.

You might be a parent or carer worried about your child or be concerned about the impact a separation or divorce might have on you, your family and your children. Perhaps your parents have remarried or found new relationships, and you now have stepsiblings or stepparents that you struggle to get to know or to find your place in a new familial dynamic. Maybe you are arguing with your siblings or with your parents and find it difficult to communicate with them effectively.

As stated above, all families will have different cultures, therefore their experiences and difficulties will differ. Below is a list of some common family issues. This list is not exhaustive, and is meant as an example only -

• Financial difficulties arising through debt, bankruptcy or redundancy
• A change to the familial structure due to death or illness
• Difficult behaviours with teenagers or older children
• Feeling of loss when children leave home
• An unwanted pregnancy or abortion
• Discovery of an infidelity or affair